Dating a Pornstar in 2022: Things to Know, Pros, Cons

Photo by Giorgio Trovato on Unsplash

Pornstars are ordinary people with very unusual jobs. They are very open about their sex life and sexuality because that’s their job, but that doesn’t mean they flaunt it publicly. It stands to reason that pornstars like to keep work life and private life separate. The word “pornstar” might not be their choice descriptor, either, and they might prefer adult film stars or adult entertainers.

Dating a pornstar for some people, it’s a non-starter; they aren’t doing it, but more importantly, they wouldn’t want to. They may be the jealous type, or they may be worried about catching STDs (a common, but misinformed concern, as industry-standard testing means porn stars are cleaner than the general population). Or maybe they don’t like the idea of having a girlfriend who mambos with other guys for a living.

I don’t imagine it will come as a surprise to anyone to hear that guys looking to date porn girls have their work cut out for them on this. Due to their special status, even a modestly successful pornstar has plenty of options when it comes to dating. But I want you to be aware that knowing how to date a pornstar means understanding that the competition is relatively stiff if you’ll pardon the pun.

There’s a good reason why porn stars tend to date other porn stars. If you’re a “civilian” (the industry term for people outside the industry), you probably wouldn’t be comfortable with your partner going off to work to have sex with other people every day. But somehow, they make it work. If the only thing you care about is their work title and not who they are as a person, then you have no place dating a pornstar in the first place. It takes a different mentality than your typical relationship. First of all, you can not be at all jealous. If you have any amount of jealousy in you, you cannot date a porn star. Just remember that she (or he) is coming back to you at the end of the day, and that makes you pretty damn unique. There are some sexy pros, but there are cons too. A Lot depends on you and how comfortable and resilient you are in the relationship and yourself.

Dating/Hookup Sites to Consider

Photo by Mika Baumeister on Unsplash

There are lots of good dating sites out there. But we’ll be looking at three top sites for you to consider.

Reddit Dirty R4R — Best 100% Free Dating Site and a place where horny Redditors can come and find one another.

AdultFriendFinder — Best Site Dedicated to Only Hookups and also one of the most well-known sites for finding quick sexual encounters, regular hookups, and literally anything else even remotely related to sex. Tinder — Largest Hookup App

Things To Know When Dating a Pornstar

Dating a porn star is complicated, and it takes a lot of trust and communication. You have to be open-minded in your relationship. If you’re dating someone in the porn industry, there’s a lot of conversation to be had based on what you’re comfortable with, and some people are cool with it while some are not.

Whatsoever, it’s all okay it’s not for everyone. It also sounds hot in theory, but it’s terrible in practice the vast majority of the time. Seeing your partner with other men/women is not easy to handle for many people, and some people can, and most people, on the other hand, can’t. So that’s first and foremost what you should think of before dating one.

Another thing you should know is that your partner will be doing this. They’ll always have to work in an expo or an event, or you see companies or brands sponsoring them, and they will have to be flirtatious. They will have to do something that would arguably not be appropriate by most relationships standards. So if it’s not something you can’t handle, then the relationship is a terrible idea.

Pros of Dating a Pornstar

Photo by Marvin Meyer on Unsplash

They Look Great

Porn stars receive huge bonuses or allowance to look good, and your new partner will fit the bill there. They will have a toned body that will make every other female and male jealous. Because there are as many people involved in the adult film industry as in pornographic genres, you’ll have no trouble finding one that appeals to you. One thing is sure: your porn star partner will be attractive in or out of clothing.

They have a lot of experience with sex.

Porn stars will teach you a thing or two when it comes to your sex life, and they’ll undoubtedly teach you and your body a lot about getting the best pleasure in bed. Aside from that, unlike some other individuals who fidget and fumble around, your partner will be much more secure with their physique, ensuring that you always have a good time.

They Have Confidence

Porn stars are probably quite outgoing and confident. They are usually reasonably comfortable in their skin and with who they are, and that attitude will also carry over into their personal lives. That means that you will be dating someone outgoing, friendly, and social. They will be able to carry a conversation and walk around the world with pride and belief in themselves. You will be able to talk frankly with your partner about nearly anything, and they will be an assurance that you’re dating someone who knows what they want, who they are, and how to express that.

They are Healthy and Clean

Photo by LYFE Fuel on Unsplash

One of the benefits of dating a porn star is that you know you are dating someone who has a clean bill of health. Even though they have a lot of sex, you don’t have to be worried about a sexually-transmitted disease. All adult industry performers do test for STDs on a routine basis. So you don’t have to worry about your bill of health off-cam as long as you know they’re using protection on-cam.

They chose you

These pornstars have had sex with different persons, but still, they chose to be in a committed relationship with you; this shows how special you are to them and how much they value you. For someone who has free sex at work, being in a serious relationship might not be a thing to consider. But if a pornstar decides to share their life with you, it means they trust you and see a future with you, because they can’t be pornstars all their lives!

They are physically active.

Pornstars have strong body stamina; apart from the drugs they use, they usually have vibrant physical health that can make them do the extra or go the extra mile while having sex with their partner or during foreplay! Apart from drugs and ecstasy pills, pornstars work out in gyms, keeping them in great shape and in good physical health. It is one of the reasons they have good stamina! If you’re dating a pornstar, they may drag you into keeping in shape and working out!

They’re Famous

Dating someone in the show business industry has a lot of benefits related to fame and celebrity. You get to partake in all the red carpet perks that a star enjoys. Simply by association, you will be able to attend parties and events and glamorous things. Dating a porn star will make you a part of the hidden, beautiful, ultra-sexy world of porn stars. You’ll be able to accompany them to events and movie premieres if they get invited.

Another huge pro of dating a porn star is that people will want pictures and autographs. There is a good chance that your partner fans and loved ones will want to stop, chat, take pictures, get a signature, and fawn over your partner while walking down the street or bus/train terminal. Dating a porn star is like dating a celebrity, and it just happens to be a celebrity who your parents might not know.

They’re Interesting

Finally, another massive pro of dating a porn star is that they will be an exciting person, and Porn performers are rarely dull, and there is little chance that your new partner will be uninteresting. So you can be positive that dating a porn celebrity means that you’ll be seeing someone who would like hanging out.

Those pros are significant to keep in mind. But remember, when you are weighing up your options about dating a porn star, there is also a slew of negative things to remember as well.

Cons of Dating a Pornstar

Photo by Dainis Graveris on Unsplash

There would be a time you’ll see your partner get treated less than human, it’s unfortunate, but it happens.


First of all, you have to give up the whole idea of monogamy. Jealousy surrounds a lot of these issues. It’s straightforward to become very jealous of your partner’s work because you’re going to see people throwing themselves at your partner regularly, whether that’s through social media or in person. And also, if you’re in a situation where you’re watching your partner on camera being intimate with someone else. I’m going to tell you right now that’s not the easiest thing in this world. There’s a high chance your partner will get hit on constantly, and unfortunately, many people don’t view sex workers as human beings. They almost view them as objects.

Social media

If you’re dating someone in the sex industry and you’re seeing their social media, especially when having sex on camera. You’re going to see them being intimate with other people, the interaction with the fans, you’re going to see your partner being flirtatious with other people. If you’re dating someone in the sex industry, I’ll highly recommend never looking at their social media and never watching any of their films.

It’s one of those things that no matter how much you prepare for it. You are going to one day see that one scene or image that’s just going to take, and it is just going to bounce around your head until the end of time. So if you can avoid that in any shape or form, that’s fine.

Health Risk

Photo by Hush Naidoo Jade Photography on Unsplash

Dating a pornstar can sometimes cost you your health. A pornstar sexually deals with multiple partners, so more partners means more problems for your sexual health and your partner’s sexual health. As a pornstar, there’s also the possibility of sexually transmitted diseases resulting from unprotected sex or a broken condom. While most porn stars take precautions, STDs are a significant risk for pornstars. Your partner might be clean, but one accident can put your health at risk, and that’s something you have to remember.

Poor Communication

No guy ever wants to ask, “Hey Beautiful, what did you do at work today?” and hear “An entire football team.” especially if you’re dating a female pornstar. It’s hard to keep up! You wouldn’t want to talk about her day at work. That talk your girlfriend has about the bitchy girl in her office is annoying, indeed. But it probably can’t compare to hearing your porn star girlfriend talking about how she can’t walk well because she had too much sex at work.


Another thing is the insecurity about being compared to others; sexually, your partner will have wealthy clients or fans, and it’s straightforward with jealousy and insecurity to feel like you’re not doing up to standards. Let’s say you watch one of your partner’s scenes, things will start coming to your head, and you’ll feel like you can’t do all of these things in bed, or you don’t produce much, or you don’t have this much money.

If you find yourself in this scenario, it’s okay if someone can do one or two things better than you, but instead of focusing on those things, you should focus on the hundreds of things you can do better than that person, and that’s where you should drive your confidence from. You have to consider this because you don’t want to waste your time, and you don’t want to waste your potential partners’ time if you cannot handle these things.

They are sometimes addicted to drugs and alcohol.

Many people in the sex industry are burdensome to the alcohol, drugs, and other kinds of stuff, and they take all these enhanced drugs and other substances to have a very high sex drive during work.

Low sex drive or they are being tired often.

Also, low sex drive or your partner being tired happens awful. Many of them have to shoot for six to 10 hours or more, and the chances are the last thing your partner will want to do is come home and have sex. I pretty much assure you that what they want to do is come home and cuddle and watch TV. However, there are exceptions to this.

It may be awkward with Family and Friends.

One of the most important things to consider is that most people never think about their family and friends if things get serious. So let’s say you start dating a porn star. In the beginning, it’s easy to tell your friends I’m dating a porn star; however, when things get serious, and it’s like I want to introduce you to my family or coworkers, know that it’s not going to be looked upon favorably. It’s probably going to be a massive negative since they know most people associate those professions are always on drugs or alcohol, and they’re not very responsible.

Photo by Xenia Bogarova on Unsplash

Can you see yourself being in a position where you can say that’s my husband or wife? They are porn stars. If you ever find yourself in that position or you’re in that position, I hope these questions help you in some way, shape, or reform.

The Bottom Line

Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash

Dating a pornstar can be a rewarding experience. Someone attractive, entertaining, and assertive with a fantastic personality will show you sincere love, devotion, and concern. You’ll have to keep certain things in mind and assess the benefits and drawbacks, but there’s no doubt that if a porn star captures your heart, you should date them. They are regular folks who work in the sex industry. Much of what we think we know about pornstars is based on guesswork, gossip, and assumptions about their lifestyle. You won’t know for sure unless you date one.

You should never take your pornstar partner’s comfort for granted. Please ensure that you have open and honest chats about what your spouse likes so that you don’t cross any lines or upset them because your view will be based on speculation.

It would be ideal if you were also prepared to encounter new experiences. If you don’t feel comfortable discussing sex openly with your girlfriend, make sure you tell her so you don’t feel awkward in her social circles, where it’s an everyday occurrence. You should be able to sit back and enjoy the experience as long as you’re chatting with your partner and you’re both on the same page regarding expectations and realities.



Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store